Monday, May 5, 2014

Bad/Awesome Flixxx Review: Razorback (1984)

"There's something about blasting the shit out of a razorback that brightens up my whole day." - Jake

"Now listen Bill. Yer in tha middle of bugger all here so for chrissakes don't go walkabout or we'll neva find ya. Now we'll be back in 5 or 6 hours." - Dicko

"It's only got two states of being- dangerous our dead. Nothing inbetween." - Jake

Wow! Watched this bad boy in Europe on tour last fall. What a great overlooked horror flick. I guess this is one of the Ozploitation flicks. I'm not sure if that term was recently-coined or not. I do know that the flicks in the category came out in the 60s, 70s, and 80s and were all pretty great genre flicks. I think they probably had little or no distro in the states and that's why some of them are under appreciated. Anyway, this one is great. It was directed by Russell Mulcahy who did the great HIGHLANDER, and the equally NOT great HIGHLANDER II. You'll also recognize a couple geezers from the first MAD MAX flick. If you like crazy ass giant wild boars, then this one is for you. I present to you a beautifully shot film, RAZORBACK!!!

This one starts out with an old dude taking care of his grandson and then all of a sudden this HUGE boar (literally) rips the house in half killing the small child. The granddude is accused of murder but he's ends up getting off because A BOAR RIPPED THROUGH HIS FUCKING HOUSE AND TORE IT IN HALF. No one believed him because anyone else who ever saw this huge thing besides him was usually killed. A couple years later we meet this lady who is an animal rights activist/ journalist. She splits from the US way down deep in the outback of Oz to search out some crummy kangaroo killers.

The journalist starts asking around at this local bar about kangaroo hunters. This flick takes place pretty far out in the middle on nowhere and the bar is one of the only spots around besides the pet food processing plant. The locals don't take kindly to a journalist coming around asking questions, especially a female one. Two of them, apparently two who specialize in killing kangaroos and who both work at said plant are tiffed and decide to make sure this journalist gets a scare so they can get on with their business. Unbeknownst to them while trying to scare (and possibly rape or have their way with her) the rednecks are themselves scared shitless when this monster boar comes upon the journalist's car and ravages it and her. So she dies. I didn't forsee that. We're only like 20 minutes into the movie and I thought she was gonna be a main character. That's good shit.

So her husband is sad. And he can't figure out what to do. No one knows what happened to her, and they don't have a body. So naturally he goes down to the middle of nowhere to find some answers. And naturally he too gets the cold shoulder from the locals. But he poses as someone who he is not. Maybe he thinks he'll get farther if they don't know who he is. The two hicks are spooked and they decide to take him out and let the boar get him too so they don't get in trouble. But they hang out with him for a bit after he seeks them out at the animal processing plant. And then they drive him into the bush and leave him for hours. He walks out and through the desert for hours and hours and finally comes on a farm. There's a super hot chick taking a shower and she screams and he screams and then passes out in front of her from exhaustion and dehydration. When he comes to, she has him in her bed taking care of him. Lucky for him she has more answers than anyone else in town. She knows about the journalist, and knows who may be able to help him. She's some kind of scientist studying seismography in the area. The team of her, him, and the old man figure out that it may have been the boar who killed his wife. The hicks freak out and think they're gonna get in trouble so they maim the old man and leave him to be killed by the boar too.

The husband is super pissed now. He knows the hicks are responsible for his buddy and his wife's death. He finds them and lowers one of them into a mineshaft killing him. Then he goes after the other one but before he can get to him the huge boar smashes the other hick to death. So now the husband and the hot chick basically have to survive and somehow kill this boar and get the hell out of there. Because like the old man said, he's either dangerous or dead. I'm gonna just go ahead and say yes, you should see this one. Its better than just a cheesy b horror movie. The cinematography is beautiful. They also built a humongous full size animatronic robot boar that cost thousands and thousands of dollars and you only see it in the film for ONE SECOND! So they need you to watch this because they're still trying to recoup the bread for that big bastard. Cheers.

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